I would go with the 18-105 VR before the 18-135. but Both are great lenses.
Most men seem to like the tele end more than most women so I would guess that the chances that she will miss the little bit of tele to 135 would be small.. so in term of range it would probably be inconsequential to her. however you will get VR with the 18-105. which is nice.
another lens to consider is the 28-75 F2.8 tamron. Most women seem to gravitate to portraiture sooner rather than later and that lens will provide her with the ability to do wonderful portraits at the expense of being not wide. just make sure you get the version with a motor for the D40
Kalgoorlie ? oh well .. just makes visits all the more fun.. (lens swap!)
Good luck with your lens hunt!